I’ve been neglecting my blog a lot lately.  I haven’t really meant to, but I am finding it hard to keep up the image I would like to have of myself.  I am not someone who has it all together.  I make loads of mistakes, and I have had to just pitch things and start over more times that I would care to admit.  Fresh starts are good for you (and me!), however, so I am going to just bite the bullet and share some things with you right now in an effort to pitch this blog image and start over honestly.

The real truth is that I am hopelessly goofy.  I can be serious when a situation calls for it, but I am not normally a serious person.  Not that I don’t indulge in plenty of introspection and “naval-gazing”, but more like I tend to find a lot of humor there.  I’m sorry if that offends anyone, but the truth is that I probably have a much harder time staying serious than you do.  I see a lot of absurdity in everything and, at least when I am away from my blog, I am not afraid to say so.  I shouldn’t be so afraid to say so here.

I’m a craft-a-holic.  SERIOUSLY.  I am so far gone that I don’t think that even a twelve step program would help me.  Just about everything that I see gives me an idea for creating something.  I’ve thought about posting the occasional pattern here just for an outlet, but I’ve never been quite sure how that might be received.  I let fear stop me.  Sad, huh?

That’s another thing about me.  I have struggled with fear for pretty much my entire life.  I’d love to tell you that, as a believer and a follower of Christ, I don’t have such problems, but that just isn’t honest.  I still have plenty of problems, I just also know where the answer can be found.  I’m hopelessly shy, but I go ahead and talk to just about everyone anyway.  I love people! By now you are probably beginning to suspect that I am a bundle of contradictions and you are absolutely correct.  I really am.  I don’t mean to be, but the truth is that I don’t fit into that perfect Southern Baptist Homeschooler mold.  I never have.  It isn’t so much that I am trying to be something that I am not.  It’s more like I’m always trying not to be what I am.  Do you ever feel that way?  So now you know something about the real me.

If you are still wondering about the title… Well, it’s just a reference to something my son yelled before pitching a pillow at his sister, but there is some truth in it.  The things that frighten us, that distract us and that set us back in life aren’t always the really big things.  Sometimes we get derailed by the little fluffy pillows like “what will they think of me if they find out that I’m a total goofball who loves puns and lame jokes?”, or “maybe I shouldn’t post that pattern here because it isn’t nearly as good as the one I once saw over at someone else’s blog”, or “maybe I shouldn’t be blogging since I’m not a great writer like “x” (and I’m sure that you know who you are!).  So this is me.  This is the real me that I have been so afraid for you to know.  Although, I hasten to assure you that no actual chickens or fluffy pillows were harmed in the writing of this post.

My blog isn’t the only thing that is getting updated this week.  We are also rearranging the furniture in several rooms and cleaning out our garage.  We are also on the receiving end of some furniture most of which is for our eldest son’s future apartment, but some of which will be coming to stay here.  Life is good and we are feeling quite blessed.  Homeschooling is off to a good start this year, too.  I’m just wishing that I had more than half of my Christmas shopping and crafting done!  Yikes!  Can you believe how close we are getting to the holidays?  

So… For the next few days, I will still be blogging, I will just be doing so while hefting large pieces of furniture about.  If you don’t see much of me, just look under the bookshelves.

1. When you go to Wowmart, what one thing do you get every single time, besides a funky-wheeled squeaking cart full of frustration?

Every single time?  No clue.  Lost in the parking lot, maybe?

2. What is something that people are currently “into” that you just don’t get or appreciate?

I’ll have to agree with Lawanda and say Vampires.  Lilly and I were just talking about that craze over the weekend.  We don’t get it.

3. What is something that really hoists your sail that other people might feel “ho-hum” about?

Bats… Economics and the free market system… Designing soft toys for children…  Lots of stuff, I imagine.  I tend to have unusual interests and hobbies.

4. Favorite song to sing in the shower or car?

I have incredibly eclectic musical tastes, so my favorite song tends to change with my mood.  I tend to just sing whatever is on my mind and whatever I am in the mood for.

5. A really great salad must have this ingredient:

Any lettuce besides the hated iceburg, tomatoes, and a sugar-free dressing!

6. Advice in a nutshell to new bloggers (one or two sentences):

Just write something! (Can you tell that I have been having some trouble with that lately?)

7. What was the alternate name that your parents almost named you? Do you wish they had chosen it instead of the one they gave you?

I am told that I almost got the middle name Lynnette instead of Renee.  I don’t think that my first name was ever really in question.

8. What in your life are you waiting for?

For a day or two when things seem easier.  It’s been a long time.  Do you know that feeling?

9. You get a package in the mail. What is it, and who is it from?

Tech’s new school book.

10. Today–what song represents you?

The Hallelujah Chorus from Handel’s Messiah as performed by Relient K?  In other words, something beyond merely upbeat!

11. What is one thing that blogging has taught you about yourself?

That figuring out how to say things is MUCH harder than finding something to say.  It is the roadblock that most often keeps me from sharing anything.

12. How are you going to (or how did you) choose the clothes you’re wearing today? What do they say about you in general or specifically how you’re feeling today?

Well, today is Eaglewood’s and my 19th anniversary, so what I plan on wearing later is something suitable for a date with my favorite guy!  As for what I am wearing right now…  “Suitable for cleaning house and working in the garage” were the main influences.

I’m pretty sure that my closet has become a metaphor for my life, and I’m really not certain how or even when that happened.  I’ve been noticing that if I keep my closet clean and orderly, not only can I find the things that I have stashed in there, but my thinking tends to be more orderly and I get more done.  So, imagine my horror when I recently took a good look at my closet and realized that it had become a total mess.  

As I started putting my closet back into order, I immediately started assessing my life (doesn’t everyone do that while cleaning out their closet?).  While my closet was undeniably a disaster area, my emotions seemed to be in order, my health was on the mend… my spiritual life?  Oops.  Now I am wondering how on earth I allowed my Savior and Lord to slip from his rightful place in my life?  It happened so easily…  I was only distracted for a short time… Sigh.   At least now you know what I am working on these days (besides the closet, that is).